Idiot Box News

If there is a poll to find out the worst English news channel, I am sure 'Headlines Today' will win it by miles. You get trash and only trash from that channel. The channel is dedicated to airing stupid celebrity gossips 24 by 7. Day before yesterday their prime time was dominated by the breaking news "Shahid Kapoor and Sania Mirza spotted together in a Mumbai mall". Since they didn’t even have the visuals to go with it (not that having visuals will make that gossip any more newsworthy), they caricatured Shahid and Sania and kept repeating those cartoons over and again. Yesterday their main news was about Sanjay Dutt calling off his marriage to whoever that girl is. If there is some event related to the word cricket taking place anywhere, then the entire day is dedicated for cricketers. So many things happen in the world and all they can find are these stupid celebrity news. They are not happy with reporting these gossips as passing news items, they take pains to turn these gossips into full-fledged shows for an hour or so with the so called 'reporter' reporting directly from the scene and 'experts' from all over the country calling in with their opinion about the incident.

The advertisement they show for their channel is an apt one for them. The adv shows some news channels airing pointless 'blah blah blahs' as news and debate, and for a 'refreshing change' the suggested channel is Headlines Today. In fact the adv looks more like it is a straight lift from what gets aired on Headlines Today.

When writing about Headlines Today, how can I miss their super hit show "Grand Stand"? Is that stupid lady who anchors that show really mad or is it only acting? How can people tolerate her in the studio? Is the recording man deaf and blind? I am sure if he sees what he captures he will grab the chair next to him and whack this lady. Her accent, actions, hairstyle and the way she presents things will convince you that either she is mad or you are going to become one soon. If she is really not mad, then I must appreciate her acting skills as it is too close to call.

From the worst channel to the worst programme - MTV Roadies 5.0.

I happened to watch a couple of episodes and now I am confused about the meaning of the word Roadie. I took Wikipedia’s help and here is what I got "The road crew (or roadies) are the technicians who travel with a band on tour, usually in sleeper buses, and handle every part of the concert productions except actually performing the music with the musicians." But that wasn't the meaning I had attributed to the term. I don’t think that is what the game show organizers also mean.

A roadie to me is someone who can ride (preferably a bike, as driving a car is much too simpler) in adverse conditions and who is a bit rough and tough to handle difficult situations and perform difficult tasks. Keeping that in mind, the show is a big disappointment to say the least. All you get to see is a set of real dumb girls and sissy guys arguing and bitching about each other throughout the show. Very few of the participating 'Roadies' know the art of driving a bike. They already had 2 accidents; one was a collision among their own bikes. Doesn't that talk volumes about their driving skills? All of them are such great stunt performers that most of them couldn't complete even one of the tasks assigned to them. That too tasks such as bowling at unmanned stumps and others like that. After a string of tasks with no results, the organizers had to invent tasks such that there will be natural elimination of one participant and hence they can declare the other as winner. Most of the episodes are filled with arguments between the lady participants on 'interesting' topics such as who among them has been flirting with the most number of guys and who is using a push-up bra (or is it pull-up?) and such crap. The guys too chip in once in a while with their contribution like "That day you tried to flirt with me. Don't you have any feelings for me?"

CRAP!

Now to the worst commercial - Pepsi YungiStaan

No words to describe this adv which features Shahrukh Khan, Deepika Padukone and Ranbir Kapoor. Let me just say that the adman who directed that adv should be shot dead. Or better still, he should be forced to watch his own creation a couple of times every day. Since I hate this adv so much, I was delighted to see the spoof by Sprite. The one in which a Ranbir-look-alike falls down after getting an electric shock when he tries to climb up the wall and then crying out things like "I am from JungleStaan, Kabaristaan" and all that... And the way the Shahrukh-look-alike cries out "Kaanthiii" is also funny. It is too good a reply and a slap on the face to the original absolute crappy adv. I am not a Sprite fan but I couldn’t resist myself from going out and buying myself a Sprite as a salute to the adv.

Deadly secrets about me

According to Jiby, tags are a good way to come back to blogging with a bang. Here is one passed on by him.

1. LAST MOVIE YOU SAW IN A THEATER: I don’t remember. I know I haven’t watched Jodha Akbar, Race, Michael Clayton or anything else in the recent weeks. So it has to be that all time crap Om Shanthi Om. Pathetic movie it is.

2. WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? Haven’t read anything for months. I just browse through ‘Randaamoozham’ every once in a while, going through random chapters, especially when I go to the loo before the day’s newspaper arrives.

3. FAVORITE BOARD GAME? Quit playing board games long back. Used to play Chess as a kid.

4. FAVORITE MAGAZINE? OutLook. Can’t stand India Today or The Week. Used to love KalaKoumudi of olden days when M.Krishnan Nair and all used to write for it.

5. FAVORITE SMELLS? Shucks!, is it alzheimer's or am I getting older? Can’t think of anything special.

6. FAVORITE SOUND? Revving of my car when I take a spinning turn.

7. WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD? The one you get when you are turned down by close friends.

8. WHAT IS THE FIRST THING YOU THINK OF WHEN YOU WAKE? Is it a weekday or a weekend?

9. FAVORITE FAST FOOD PLACE? Used to love most of US’s breakfast chains. Since every other blogger has included Thattukadas in this answer, so be it. The ones near Medical College which used to be open till early morning.

10. FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? Dhridharashtrar or Drishtyadhrumyan

11. FINISH THIS STATEMENT. "IF I HAD A LOT OF MONEY I'D...? Buy all the cars and bikes I want and a house with a MLPL (Multi Level Parking Lot). Mr. Ambani, is your under construction house for sale?

12. DO YOU DRIVE FAST? Yea.

But since everybody else has taken this question as an opportunity to proclaim their philanthropy and safe driving practices, let me follow suit. I speed only on clear roads when I am sure I won’t cause accidents.

13. DO YOU SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? No. I have a feeling that this is some kind of a trick question though.

14. STORMS-COOL OR SCARY? Cool (as long as I am indoors).

15. WHAT WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? Hyundai Accent.

16. FAVORITE DRINK? Vodka with Coke. Vodka gets removed from the answer when I need a politically correct answer.

17. FINISH THIS STATEMENT, "IF I HAD THE TIME I WOULD ..... be doing more or less the same things I am doing now. I am not hard pressed for time.

18. DO YOU EAT THE STEMS ON BROCCOLI? I don’t even eat Broccoli, forget about the stem.

19. IF YOU COULD DYE YOUR HAIR ANY COLOR, WHAT WOULD BE YOUR CHOICE? Nothing prevents me from dyeing my hair any color of my choice. But since I haven’t done that, I think that’s how I like my hair to look. So with you Jiby, BLACK!

20. NAME ALL THE DIFFERENT CITIES/TOWNS YOU HAVE LIVED IN. Pala, Mangalore, Trivandrum, Mumbai, Bangalore, Chicago.

21. FAVORITE SPORTS TO WATCH? Cricket, football, tennis.

22. ONE NICE THING ABOUT THE PERSON WHO SENT THIS TO YOU. The courage to attempt to follow his dream.

23. WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? Nothing.

24. WOULD YOU LIKE TO BE BORN AS YOURSELF AGAIN? I don’t know. May be no.

25. MORNING PERSON, OR NIGHT OWL? Night. I just can’t get up early. Staying back as late as it takes has never been an issue for me (for anything other than studies)

26. OVER EASY, OR SUNNY SIDE UP? Sunny side up. Partly because that’s a safe thing to say in most of the breakfast joints when they list down before you the innumerable egg preparations.

27. FAVORITE PLACE TO RELAX? Couch opposite TV.

28. FAVORITE PIE? I hate pies.

29. FAVORITE ICE CREAM FLAVOR? I don’t like ice creams.

30. OF ALL THE PEOPLE YOU TAGGED THIS TO, WHO'S MOST LIKELY TO RESPOND FIRST? I tag Rat, Sand, Vimal and Surya. My guess is Rat.

“The Loot” Marthahally, Bangalore

"The LOOT loots you!!!"

This is about the apparel store “The Loot” at Marthahally, Bangalore. I must say they have chosen an apt name for their store, as they intent to do just that, ie, loot you. Here is my account of a not so pleasant shopping experience there.

03/FEB/2008
I bought two pairs of Lee Jeans from this shop on Feb 3rd. Both had their waist size printed as 34, but one of them was a defective piece. Its actual waist size was 32. I realized this only after reaching home.

05/FEB/2008
I went back to the store and reported the issue. They said I could pick another jeans in exchange. I checked out their collection but couldn’t find any other pair of size 34. They only had blue jeans in size 34. I had already purchased one pair in blue. So the sales supervisor (Sadakat) told me he would get fresh stocks in a week and I could select after a week. He took down the jeans size, cut, color etc for tracking and assured me he would call me within a week. He also gave me a letter authorizing me to perform an exchange any time I wanted.

A week passed by...I didn’t get any call from Sadakat. I called him up. He said the stocks hadn’t come and asked me to wait for another 10 days. He promised he would inform me when the stocks reached. I waited for 2 more weeks. Same story again. He didn’t even bother to call me. I had to call him up once again. He said he hadn’t got the stock for size 34. I told him I wanted my money back. He said he could not refund the money and could only replace the merchandise. I told him I had been waiting for almost a month to get a replacement and that’s why I asked for reimbursement. I said I would have to look for other options like moving to consumer court or something like that. At that point he asked me to visit the store and settle the matter.

01/MARCH/2008
I went to the store to get my money back after almost a month. Sadakat started repeating the same story, ie, I can pick any stuff in exchange and he cannot return the money. I asked him to hand me a pair of 34 size LEE jeans which is not blue. He couldn’t do that and kept on repeating the same statement over and over again that I need to adjust and accept a replacement. I said I have waited for a month to get a replacement and since they were not able to get me the stuff I needed, I wanted my money back. After some more pointless argument, this guy went inside and sent another person who was introduced as the store manager Rafeeq. Rafeeq had the same set of stupid arguments “you have to adjust… pick up a blue jeans… our policy is that we don’t refund money” and some such crap.

Come on. How many pairs of blue jeans will I pick from the same store? How can a store have a policy of their own, violating the law of the land? How much more arrogant can a store manager get when he says “You do whatever you want, I will not refund your money”. That too when I have already waited for a month to get a replacement for a defective piece he sold me.

The Loot is one of those shops which is least bothered about customer satisfaction. They don’t mind being arrogant to you even when they very well know that they are on the wrong side of the law. I tried looking on the net for an email id or a phone number of Loot where I can raise a complaint. But none is available. I know one Mr. Jay Gupta is the owner of this firm but no contact details are available on net.

My request to you all, please stay away from this place and don’t get looted.

Randaamoozham

A drifter.

That’s what I am.

I drift from places, people, ideas... I keep moving from pasture to pasture. My attention spans have become shorter and shorter. My priorities keep changing. Often I burn the bridges behind me.

Its been a long time since I posted something here. I guess I am regular here only when I am comparatively free elsewhere. So does that mean blogging has gone down in my priority list? May be yes. But I don’t think I can say I have picked up some new activity which replaced blogging. Its just that it moved to the background on its own.

I had seen this post from Thanu some time back and thought of linking it up here and saying "Ditto". But then on second thought I wanted to keep my options (and my blog) open.

I have come back to my page after a long time. Read some of my previous posts once again. Felt like deleting most of them :). Since it wasn’t that entertaining to re-read my crap, I decide to go through my friends blogs one by one. Nice to see most of them are still active. Found the latest post on Jiby’s blog. Was truly amazed to see a mention there.

I can identify with most of Jiby’s posts. When I read about the way he feels about his college life, his US life, his present, I often see a black cat moving (ref : Matrix). This latest post got me thinking. I agree with him, I was active in blogging because of the community. It was to keep that friend circle alive that I used to blog. Like how you often go to a Coffee Day for 'Conversation' rather than 'Coffee', even though they tag themselves 'Coffe and Conversations'. The gang was great - Sharing happenings, news, thoughts, view points, stories with each other. Now after reading Jiby's post, I feel like starting it all over again. I don’t think I will be that regular now, work steals most of my awake hours. But I still want to hang around here, with an occasional post now and then; so that I will still belong to the ‘gang’; I wont get cut off.

If I don’t thank ‘the gang’ members -Poison- and Kickassso for their help, it will be an injustice. I wanted an acco for my bro and his friend at Tvm for a month. I tried through some of my other contacts but couldn’t manage to get anything convenient. I contacted Poison through mail, I saw him forwarding that to Kickasso, I gave a call to Kickasso, kickasso in action, swift and fast. Acco ready in flat 2 hours. Thank you very much guys. Really really appreciate your help.

About my latest coordinates: Changed country, continent, client, account, company, marital status among others. Back to Bangalore for the time being.

Life is beautiful. :)

Geo the brat!

Ok. Quills the princess has ordered me to write about my childhood :) Its called ‘The Wonder Years Tag’. The tag is to list 8-10 things that you liked as a child (0-12 years) and 8-10 things you disliked. I don’t remember too much about my childhood, guess I am getting old. Just some vague images flashing…


1. When I think about the happy times of my childhood, the best memory I have is about a Christmas Eve night journey. I was very young. All my dad’s siblings and their families gather together at my ancestral home for all the major occasions. So this time, for some reason I couldn’t reach my ancestral home until the day before xmas (I don’t remember the reason now). All my cousins were enjoying there. My dad’s youngest bro came to pick me up late in the evening, and that night journey to my ancestral home, where all my relatives were waiting for me, all the houses on both sides of the road decorated with stars and lightings, all the people on the roads and junctions celebrating xmas… that journey was too good. One of the best memories I have about my childhood.

2. The next thing that comes to my mind is about the time I have enjoyed on play grounds. As a kid, I (and my friends) used to play cricket in the rubber plantations, football in paddy fields (after harvest), shuttle in our courtyard and then a lot of other simpler games. We used to play till our moms practically dragged us in.

3. Theres a somewhat big water stream near my place. Its not as big as a river, but it still had enough and more adventures packed for us kids, especially during monsoon. We used to spend hours and hours there taking bath, swimming, diving, and fishing with our towels etc.

4. Daytime was entirely dedicated to games or water sports :_) When I was doing neither, I was cycling. I used to go cycling through the inner roads, ‘inventing’ a new route whenever possible. Used to enjoy those cycle rides through the countryside.

5. I remember the school annual celebrations. It used to be so much fun. All of us participating in something or the other… Me being the shameless exhibitionist I am, I used to be part of as many events as I could. I still remember those dramas with painted faces, skits etc… One added advantage was the prizes and cash awards which we used to get on the annual day.

6. In line with what I have written as point 1, the time I have spent with my family is truly priceless. The thing that I miss most these days. Whenever we all are together, it’s a real festival.



Now the things that I dislike.

1. First and foremost – Sunday school :_) Used to have endless negotiations with my mom to arrive at treaties where by I was to attend one, and then bunk the next two and so on :_). The threat that they wont let us marry if we don’t pass 10th grade catechism was the only factor which motivated me to drag myself in ;_) (Looking back, I should be proud that I was very clear about my priorities in life from a very young age ;)

2. I used to hate it when we were forced by the school authorities to attend ‘first Friday’ prayers, retreats or any such religious activities.

Cant think of anything else. I don’t remember hating any specific food items, or studies or anything like that. I don’t even regret having a lot of ‘street fights’ ‘school fights’ (corrected after Venus's exclamation) with my class mates. That too was fun. I think I really enjoyed most of the other things about my childhood.